no hope. no love. no glory.

& sill a happy ending 

"Why should all life be work, when we all can borrow

Let's only think about today, and not worry about tomorrow"

quote from Zelda’s yearbook- May 1918

To Scott, From Zelda

Sweetheart,
     Please, please don’t be so depressed—We’ll be married soon, and then these lonesome nights will be over forever—and until we are, I am loving, loving every tiny minute of the day and night—
     Maybe you won’t understand this, but sometimes when I miss you most, it’s hardest to write—and you always know when I make myself—Just the ache of it all—and I can’t tell you.
     If we were together, you’d feel how strong it is—you’re so sweet when you’re melancholy. I love your sad tenderness—when I’ve hurt you—That’s one of the reasons I could never be sorry for our quarrels—and they bothered you so— Those dear, dear little fusses, when I always tried so hard to make you kiss and forget—
     Scott—there’s nothing in all the world I want but you—and your precious love—All the materials things are nothing.
     I’d just hate to live a sordid, colorless existence-because you’d soon love me less—and less—and I’d do anything—anything—to keep your heart for my own—I don’t want to live—I want to love first, and live incidentally…
     Don’t—don’t ever think of the things you can’t give me—You’ve trusted me with the dearest heart of all—and it’s so damn much more than anybody else in all the world has ever had—
     How can you think deliberately of life without me—If you should die—O Darling—darling Scott—It’d be like going blind…I’d have no purpose in life—just a pretty—decoration.
     Don’t you think I was made for you? I feel like you had me ordered—and I was delivered to you—to be worn—I want you to wear me, like a watch—charm or a button hole bouquet—to the world.
     And then, when we’re alone, I want to help—to know that you can’t do anything without me…
     All my heart—
     I love you

Sick Life

Sorry! I've been out for a long time here but I have good reasons.
I'm sick again. I have like 3 Viruses in my blood & the Anemia is still there.
I feel most of the time really tired. Tired and hungry! I see food and I want to eat & eat & eat ( maybe because my organism need energy to fight against all the bacterias I have)
Now I'm taking antibiotics that makes me feel really dizzy.
As soon as I feel better I will write some stuff.
It seems like I'm going to make a little trip but I'm still not sure.
More of that later.
Bye bye sweethearts! I hope to see you soon.

xx
C.

Happy Birthday Zelda!

Happy birthday to one of the most gorgeous woman ever seen!

July 24, 1900

"Oh, the secret life of man and woman—dreaming how much better we would be than we are if we were somebody else or even ourselves, and feeling that our estate has been unexploited to its fullest”

no more days

i'm going to stop posting by days
like "day 1"
is boring
hahaha
& the project keeps going
I have now a invitation to travel
is cool i need to get out more
take the city out of my lungs
but the m o n e y

Day 8 : untitled

shh shh

the shadows are here

hush hush

is all i can hear

but no

no

i won't let them win

Day 7 : The Pool

So one of the points of this project was : find a friend owner of a country house
I couldn'd get any
but! but , I was invited to a pool party
I usually don't like pools, because the sun,the people,the swimsuit & the sun (yes i really don't like the sun)
Turns out it was pretty good idea.
It was fun & relax
& I found a girl who was like me : she was avoiding the sun, she didn't knew how to swim & just wanted to stay at a corner inside the pool doing nothing
So I joined.
It was nice.

Still no affair btw

Day 6 : About Life

Being depressed without knowing is dangerous.

2 years ago,I remember I crashed my car 2 times in one month. My dad was crazy.The first time I crashed I remember that my first thought was : "I hope the car is okay"
The second time : "oh god...this time is gonna be expensive" Even though I hit my head with the glass and my neck was hurting like hell..to be honest I couldn't care less about me.

When I recovered I felt more alive (annoyingly alive) funny how we feel like that after something literally hits you. At school I didn't do my homework. At house...I don't even remember what I used to do. Just staying in bed all day sleeping was okay for me. & when my friends called me to invite me to go out I always had an excuse to decline the invitation "oh i'm sorry I have work to do"

I stopped using makeup...I wore just oversized pijamas & most of the money I got I used to spend it on food. I looked around just with envy. "ugh! everyone is happy nowdays"

My mom always asked me why I always was so serious...I just looked at her with a frown. I wasn't being serious I was just...dull.

So at christmas while everyone was happy and hugging each other, the only thing that was in my head was the idea of start over: "new year is coming...maybe everything is gonna change"

With new year came a thing called hope.

I never thought about killing myself.I was just not living nor surviving. Suriving mens that even if the world is against you,you want to keep on going; but me...I was just breathing.

Weeping all night hoping the tears would wash away my worries a new year began.

& now I'm okay.
The urge of do new stuff, create projects & make plans was overwhelming.
Still is.
Is never to late to cheer up.

Day 5: Trova nights

This time I have an odyssey.
My sister invited me to a trove night at the park & obviously I said 'yes! Let's go'
So I was wearing the most flapper outfit I could find ( no, wait that's not the point) My sister & her boyfriend paid for everything ( actually the one who wanted to go to the trove night was her boyfriend ) We were on the queue & all of a sudden the people said the ticket would cost much more, thank good my sister had some money too but some people decided not to go inside (for real it was ridiculous! The ticket was 4 dlls & the cost changed to 10 dlls including babies & kids! Is a bloody park with no seats for gods' sake!)

I'm sooo late with posts

But I'm waiting for the photos
& a lot of things happened
Nothing amazing
But I'm writing down everything okay
The project is still on!
Woo hoo!

Day 4: 'Yes' is the answer

'Yes' is always the answer was one of the main points of this Zelda's summer
So my dad told me: 'I need to do some errands, do you want to join me?'

Just a thought...

I was watching the horizon full of houses trough the car's window, while the fresh air and the cloudy sky took their tool on me.
& I started to wonder: with so many people in one city & almost infinite people around the world...

how am I going to find you?

Day 3: Flapper

Flapper where woman who fight to get the right to vote
so what did I did?
I went out I did vote.

the problem is: a lot of women now have air inside their heads
But I still have hope.

Day 2: a fever you can't sweat out

I was kind of sleeping when my mom knocked at my door.
It was 2 am.
My mom was scared and she jous touched my forehead and said: you have fever
I was like: fever?
Then she gave me a pill and a glass of water
I didn't even asked what kind of pill it was I just swallowed it
She left my bedroom door open so she could check my temperature
I fell asleep

& now I feel okay.

Day 1: Anemia strikes again!

Dear anemia:
f*ck you :)

If Zelda had a mental breakdown, I have an anemia breakdown.
I feel like hell. My hands are cold, my feet are cold, but inside I feel like I have flames burning me.
It never crossed my mind that having anemia would be something so annoying.
I feel like a 85 year old trapped inside a 22 years old body.
If I try to run or walk fast, breathing turns heavy
I'm tired all the time
I'm scared of pass out
I'm never hungry but I have to eat anyways
& if I stand up fast, my vision gets cloudy

I HATE THIS

why am I so pathetic?
but you know what anemia?
you can't bring me down!

The Zelda Project

Ciao!
Come stai?
I was searching some info about Zelda Fitzgerald & I found this amazing post about How To Have A Zelda Fitzgerald Summer . If you want to read the article just click the link, if not...well is basically a list of things to have a Zelda summertime. On a nutshell is this:

• Do not work
• Befriend someone with a country house
• 'Yes' is always the answer
• Fall in love

 & guess what? I'm totally doing this & not just that, I'm going to add more things to this list so I can feel like a real flapper.
For example other stuff that Zelda used to do like:

• Dance (she had an obsession with ballet)
• Writing ( after she had a breakdown, she was not longer allowed to have dancing lesson, so she wrote a novel called "Save Me The Waltz" based on her own life & marriage but the book was unsuccessful but she still wrote a couple of things)
•  Painting (after the failure of her book she decided to express herself through painting)

etc. etc. etc. but mainly this.

I'm using this blog to show you all how is my project going. Kinda like a diary.
So, let's begin with this Zelda mayhem!

Very sincerely yours, C.
xx

So I'm back (unfortunately)

Hello sweethearts!
I'm back with some news.
I have to stay at home as much as I can (just to rest) but I can go out to do some stuff that doesn't requiere a lot of effort.
Why? Well turns out I have anemia (I even fainted) big show indeed.
so that actually half ruined my summer (I hate summer by the way, the sun makes my skin burn in flames, like a vampire)

Sooooooo! I've been a little nostalgic & now I spend my days reading articles online or books or book reviews or reblogging stuff on tumblr.

Watching 'Midnight in Paris' didn't help.
I got caught by the character of Zelda Sayre (F. Scott Fitgerald's wife) I was hooked.
So I made some research about her. I fell in love with her. Her paitings, her letters, her life, her...everything!

So I'm kind of posposing the project I had of making a online comic about a story I was writting. I'm focusing now on Zelda Fitzgerald.

You'll know about that later.
For now...go outside and enjoy your summertime.
see you next post!

xx
C.

Hello!

I'm back (I feel like the hobbit "there and back again" LOL )


Just I have some stuff I want to share with you.


First: My Portfolio
Second: I stopped posting "The Bachelor" because I had a better idea on how to make the story, so wait for the surprise soon okay?


And I also made another blog with my artwork HERE if you are interested


I hope to be back on track tomorrow so, have a nice weekend!


:)

Chapter 2 of Bachelor is up!

Go go power ranger.
LOL


I leave you the link HERE
click it & enjoy it!


thank you!
laters!


xx 


C.

Hello my Baker Street Irregulars!

GUESS WHAT?!
I'm (half) back!
hahaha
Just to announce that maybe I'm gonna move my blog to another page
yes yes
okay but
I wasn't gonna talk about that
the good news is:
I have another blog YEIII!
but is not like this one!
Is a online novel (story? dunno how to call it) that I'm writting
I'm posting the link here so you can give it a look


click here---> Bachelor

I'm updating it one a week
Hope you like it Sweethearts!
bye bye
See you next time!


Very sincerely yours,C.

xx

my sweet baker street irregulars!

hahaha that's how I'm gonna call you all!
Even thou you never answer me.
Maybe I should pay you.
Whatever that's not the point, let's focus.
I've been busy, yes, very busy brainstorming & writing so...
This week I'm just posting this.
I have a lot of things to say but I can't.
I don't have the time to explain.
& you won't have the time to listen.
BUT
If you want to send me some ideas, questions or thoughts.
I'm leaving this mail:
im.not.much.a.poet.but.a.criminal@gmail.com
for direct contact!
or if you need to talk
whatever you want I'm here okay?
& also if you know where on earth is:
-Ville Valo
-Benedict Cumberbatch
-Theo Hutchcraft
or
-Adam Anderson
I would be very pleased to hear (read) you.


Very sincerely yours,C.

Lots of hearts- I like big books.

Reading is not difficult. Look: Reading is not difficult.

Escapism- Art Student Owl

About Life & Other Tragedies- Baby Blue

Lately I've been hanging out with 50 year old ladies. Not complaining.Actually I enjoy their company.What can I say? I have an old soul. The reason is that a lot of people that used to live in my neighbourhood is getting married or having babies so they make reunions to celebrate those happy moments.

Last Saturday I went to a bachelorette party. There we found a lady who invited us like 3 months ago to the wedding of her daughter. But she was just sad.

Highlights- the telly!

I really find this photo amazing.I just took the photo from the telly.

me likey.

let't take random pics from the telly!

Copy Cat- Hearts

Double Rainbow!

I mean... double post today!
Sorry for the delay
I'm sorry.
I'm being busy, busy bee.
bssss bssss.
LOL.
I need some sleep.
I'm bored.
BORED.
Even thou I'm pretty sure you didn't notice my absence.
sad me is sad.
Not Really.
:)

Escapism- Writting

 Today I'm going to show you something really embarrassing. It is a notebook from 2006. In this notebook I was writing a (I don't know how to call it) story.

About Life & other Tragedies- Plans

Long time ago I made some plans. 2012 was not the deadline.I just made plans according to other stuff. Like: "when i finish school I'm gonna do this & that"

Well this & that are not gonna be possible (cheers for that!)

Highlights- Rain

Today was raining. I love the colour of the light when is cloudy.I love rain. Just makes me feel relaxed & melancholic. Like on a movie, you know? You start thinking about everything you have done. Daydreaming .

Lots of hearts- Run,Nights & Voices

I'm sorry for the delay but I had a lot of stuff to do this weekend & for some weird reason I schedule post but they stay as drafts. I'm gonna fix that , I promise! now let's go straight to the point :)

Escapism- Hoarding

I carry around so much stuff in my purse that probably I don't gonna need & I know it. But what if I need it?

About Life & other Tragedies- Don't look back

I always carry my journal everywhere. One time my friend took it & a pic of me fell to the floor. The pic was missing the other half.In that half used to be one person who made of my life a living hell.But that's not the point.

Highlights- The Lost Art of Letters.

Post Office.P.O. box.Postcards.Stamps. You must think by now: "do we still have these in my town?"

Copy Cat- Schroeder

Sorry for the delay! A lot of things happened today! My emotions are wasted. So, here we go!

Lots of Hearts- Something for the weekend!

Today I have many options! If you like music I have something for you, I f you like movies & other stuff. If this weekend you don't know what to do, then maybe you should give it a look at the recommendations this of this week.

Escapism- Brainstorm

I make brainstorms of everything...

About Life & Other Tragedies- Mind on Mars

Today I have a funny story.

I don't know if you heard about 30 seconds to mars (of course you do,why am i being silly?)

So now i want to share something with all of the people who likes this band, especially with the ones who love Jared Leto.

I went to the Taste of Chaos on 2007 (it was the last show of Matt and then he left the band) It was in El Paso TX.

Highlights- Books

Hello!!

This time I found inspiration at my own house. Lately I been desperate for reading something new. I was thinking about get some new books. When I was at the bookstore I went like: WHOOPS! 

They are really expensive ( i don't get that, everyone complains about the fact that people don't read and stuff but of course they are not gonna do it if a book is more expensive that a six-pack of beer! )

Copy Cat- Sherlock

Inspiration: BBC Series/ Sherlock

Characters:Sherlock Holmes & John Watson

What to wear: Basically what you need to dress like Sherlock is a blazer & shirts; (black,dark blue,grey & ivory are the main colours) & don't forget to left 1 or 2 buttons unbuttoned . He usually wears trousers but when he uses jeans they are very very dark colour so they don't look a lot like jeans. It's very simple & If is cold then a long coat is the right choice.
On the other side Watson wears lots of cardigans & sweaters.Also he use a lot of plaid shirts (under the sweaters) & those big worker shoes. & if it's cold he wears jackets that had a lot of pockets or leather patches & cozy warm collars.Neutral colors seems to be their favourite but to be honest sometimes he uses colors like dark red  well...basically warm colors.

Sorry for the inconvenience!

This weekend I won't post anything . I'm making some adjustments on the blog. I'm trying to make it more interesting. So I'm gonna change some stuff to start fresh the next week.


Hope you have a wonderful weekend.


xxx&ooo

Lots of hearts- PHINX

I found this band on New Years Day while I was having a favourite bands music withdrawal (yeah, my two favourite bands are having a break I don't know what to do *me cries* ) So click over click I end up with this.

Escapism- Thank you for shopping with us!

I must confess...I have weird mania (obsession? disorder? god knows what the hell it is) of keeping every single ticket & receipt I get.

About Life & Other Tragedies - Cheater Eater

If you need a role model don't wait more. After you read this you gonna have one.
This is the story of someone I met. I'm avoiding names.

You'll see, all started the other day. I was just laying in the couch,having a lovely time & thinking about well...that's not the point. The point is, We got a visit (my mom & I ). This lady (because I hangout with 40-60 years old women lately) started to tell to me & my mom (obviously) a short version of her life this last year.& it goes like this:

Highlights- The City

Copy Cat! - New Years Day!

The inspiration for this outfit is (of course) New Years Day !